What I'm doing right today

I am back in Earnest at my ongoing quest to get healthy. OK, I still can't get myself out of bed to exercise at 6 am, but I downloaded the My Fitness app on my ipod touch which allows me to track my caloric intake and energy output for free and track my weight as well. This is working overall as a slap in the face as to how much of a problem I have with portion control. I'm using a lot of self talk to convince myself I don't need to be eating all the time. I cleaned off the dining room table, and am trying to bring back actual sit down family dinner. Tonight I helped my 4 year set and clear the table and we all sat down and ate at the table. What a concept huh? My mother always set the table and we always sat down to dinner. I'm not sure why I let this tradition go by the board in my house, it's an important part of family life. So back to sit down at the table dinners for us. Overall I feel good about the lifestyle changes that I have initiated. Something happened to me last year. My father having a liver transplant last August just created havoc in my life emotionally. The waiting, the worrying and then the stress of the surgery, the relief of the surgery being successful and then the fear of his first rejection episode right at Christmas made me crazy, drained, impatient, tired, and lazy. My recovery from this has been slow. Which is part of the reason I am starting this blog/journal. To start to make myself look at the fact I put my life on hold, and now I have to pick it up and put it back together again. Which I will, I have way to much to look forward too...

Ruby

I'm sitting on the couch watching Ruby on Style Network. She is trying to figure out why she is fat. I'm fat and I know why I am fat. I eat too much. I eat when I'm bored, when I'm mad, when I'm nervous. We never have enough money, I have a stressful job, trying to keep the household going and keep up a marriage is hard. My child could talk the fuzz of a peach and try the patience of a saint on a good day. So, I'm fat. Now I'm not as fat as Ruby, but I think she is inspiring me to stop eating, because lord knows I don't need to be as fat as Ruby. I am freaking lazy. I don't have to be to work until 9. I should be getting up at 6 to exercise. Why the heck don't I? Is it because of some traumatic episode in my past? Maybe, or maybe I'm just lazy. Stuck in a cycle of Lazy. Today starts daylight savings , plenty of light, planty of sunshine coming up. So tomorrow I am going to try and break the cycle of lazy. I'll let you know how that goes....